The Most Natural Thing
Over the past couple of weeks a friend and I had discussed going out to reconnect. To be honest we had not seen each other in a while and we had some catching up to do. Plus he's been wanting to publish a book, so yes, we had to sit and talk. We had discussed getting together but I thought he had things going on and he could get to me later. I didn't perceive him seeing me as a priority. I was really thinking after Christmas but it was clear that it was going to be sooner. After going through my calendar I decided on Friday. Like yesterday Friday. Then I had to decide where to go... Ugh!!! Decisions. Decisions. Taste of Belgium? I really wanted a lavender crepe. I didn't even get it. #sadface
Y'all I was so mad on Friday morning. I couldn't figure out what to wear and it was the last day of school for Winter Break and the previous night Tyler hits me with, "Can you bring cupcakes to my school?" I just didn't have this type of time. Lol. In my mind I'm like you're going to see this day through. It's all going to work out. It always does. School goes well. Tyler gets his cupcakes. I think I look o.k. I didn't feel cute in my mirror. I looked tired but I wasn't. Then it got mad cold and the wind was blowing and the restaurant had too bright of lighting. Another Ugh!!! He's running late. Hell, I just want to run. I should find another restaurant, I should cancel. I know my girlfriends are reading this and either laughing or laughing really hard. When the going gets tough, Arlinda simply gets gone. Ain't nobody got time for this. Lol
Then he calls and tells me he's parking his car and I check my makeup using my phone's screen. I don't feel cute at all. Though I'm glad I put the effort to appear together. But who cares? Why am I stressing over this? It's just my friend. My friend who I have never went out to eat with. My friend who I have not seen in a long time. My friend who is coming into the restaurant right now. My friend who comes to me and hugs me, while planting a kiss on my cheek, and sits in front of me with this absolutely beautiful brown skin and warm smile. And he's well groomed, well dressed, smells like a cologne sample and I think that somewhere between the time he entered the seating area and sat in front of me I have lost my train of thought. I had to sip my tea. Where's Kermit when you need him?
We talk for well over an hour while eating chicken and waffles and hamburger with goat cheese. The more we talk I notice something. He's sees this as a natural conversation while I all of a sudden need to find the server. "Ice water please! With extra ice." "I can get you extra ice, you want lemon too?" "I don't want extra ice but water please." By now my nose is sweating and I'm blushing constantly. He asked me if I was warm, I told him no, my nose was just sweating. He asks why. No...... Wasn't going to answer that question. Not right then. I'll share now that I'm in more control of my setting. I've learned over the years that my nose sweats when I'm attracted to someone. My nose doesn't sweat often and it hasn't in a very long time so... Yeah. As much as I try to be in control of situations my nose tells on me. Lol.
As we leave the restaurant he makes it known that he's a gentleman and we continue this conversation as we walk to my car. A couple of hours later we have another conversation and we laughed and laughed. I'm like am I 46 or 16? I've become a little more comfortable since my nose is trying to clue me in. As we end the conversation he makes it a point to bring up my shyness and the conversation ends on a really good note. As we say our goodbyes he says to me, "That felt natural didn't it?" After I calmed down and understood that he's a part of my journey it actually felt like everything was supposed to happen in the exact manner that it did.
I know I'll see him soon. Instead of trying to force controlling the situation I'll let it flow. Naturally. He's a cool guy and apparently my nose knows.