Just Where I Am

This post was originally posted on 8/26/18

 

Where I am in my life is quite interesting. I have been a believer in God for years. I've been practicing mindfulness for a couple of years. This summer I began a keto eating lifestyle and I feel really good about that. I am entering in my 4th week of a self-care challenge and I am realizing a couple of things about myself. 

One, is that I am not stressing over things that are not stressing over me. Well, what exactly does that mean Arlinda? I'm glad you asked. My energy is mine to have and mine to give out. If I give that energy out and it's disregarded or taken advantaged of, I'm now inclined to take my energy back and distance myself from what does not make me feel good about myself.

I had someone recently tell me that I need to let people know when their actions make me feel some kinda of way. I guess that's a good idea but that's not where I am. It's better for me to distance myself, process what happened and keep it moving. I'm just not here for having the same conversations over and over. How often have we heard, "If you can't change the people around you, change the people around you."? Change is necessary.

The second thing is this notion of "fitting in"? In my self-care challenge it has been magnified that I've constantly had my hand up yelling, "Look up at me! I can do this! I can do that! Pick me!" Whether it's in ministry, at work, in friendships or in potential relationships. I know my skill set, I'm quite aware of my resume, I know my worth and I know who God has called me to be. It's time out for trying to fit into social circles that don't edify me and uplift my gifts and talents. Plus I absolutely refuse to dumb down for anyone. Again, my resume. 

So, if anyone notices a difference in how I operate, in how I am no longer concerned about whether or not you pick me, that I'm cool with being not so busy trying to please others, it's just where I am. I'm just taking care of myself.  

Namaste

Infused by Arlinda McGlothin - McKinley

 

Infused

After a failed marriage Lindar enters into a situationship with a love interest from her past. He infuses and inspires Lindar to become a writer. Lindar has to learn many difficult lessons, including how to love herself. Once the relationship ends she goes on a quest of redemption to prove to the world and to herself that she is truly something special.

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I Choose Joy - Originally Posted 3.8.2020

One year ago today I made one of the biggest decisions of my life, to choose joy. I remember discussing it afterwards in therapy. We discussed the number 8 and how that number means new beginnings and that the day was International Women’s Day.

Today is International Women’s Day and I’m feeling so honored to be a woman empowered to say no to those things that no longer serve me and to choose joy over being comfortable. God didn’t call us to blend in but to stand out. You have to have faith to step out of the boxes that have confined you, without faith it is impossible to please God.

It’s been an amazing journey of hurt, depression, not knowing what’s next and if I could do it all over on March 8, 2019 I’d still choose joy. This above all to thine ownself be true.

(Excerpt From Diligently, “I Choose Joy”)

On March 8th, I woke up and prepared for my day. As with every payday, I checked my checking account. However, on this day, I didn’t get paid by my employer. I decided that in that moment I wasn’t going to get upset. God had been good to me thus far and there was no reason to think that He didn’t have that under control either. Weeks prior, my parents purchased new furniture and I asked if I could have my grandmother’s recliner. My grandmother had passed several years ago, and I couldn’t let them get rid of her chair.

When the chair arrived at our home, we had no idea where we would put it. Alex’s idea was to place it next to our ottoman that sat in the middle of the room. I told him that it didn’t make sense, although to this day that is where I sit to watch Sports Center in the morning with my Greek yogurt or steel-cut oatmeal. I was sitting in that chair upon realizing that I had no pay and a therapy appointment in an hour.

God spoke to me as I sat there.“If you had to go back to where you were reassigned in order to get paid today, would you go?”

My immediate response was, “No; I choose joy!”

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