It Went Down In the DM.... Well Kinda

Exactly one month ago I received a friend request on Fb. I thought absolutely nothing of it. Within an hour I received a DM from him. My immediate thought was, "What does he want? Why is he calling me Christine? He don't even know me." But then something happened.

The conversation continued for days and we finally met in person. To be honest, when we first met I was not feeling it at all. He was nice. We laughed but there was no attraction. So with that we had a good visit and we went on about our way. I pretty much thought he thought the same things, so I definitely was not expecting to hear from him again. 

However......

There was something that seemed to draw us to each other. Within days after the visit, we were talking more and hanging out more. The conversations centered around our faith and our families. We discussed our upbringings and our careers. We discussed past hurts and future hopes. 

We clearly had some differences but those differences made for good conversations and within a couple of weeks our friendship had begun to establish itself as a force to be reckoned with. We became safe spaces for each other to be our truest authentic selves. We both could be existing in the same space doing those things that brings us happiness, with me it was writing or reading a chapter and with him it was dancing around and bonding with his family, Yet we were able to find time for both verbal and nonverbal cues that said, "I'm glad that you're around. You're beautiful. You matter to me."

For me that was very different than previous experiences with becoming friends with men. Here is this guy really making time to get to know me, pouring into me, covering me with prayer and showering me with beautiful thoughts and compliments. Who at first I was like, "Naw, this is not what the people want." Now the thought is, "You two are perfect for each other in this season of your lives." We've both been through a lot lately, to some extent we both had given up hope in several areas of our lives. To be able to sit and have those conversations with no expectations of sex, no expectations of being taken for granted and no expectation of this friendship being hurtful like our past experiences has made his initial DM kinda cool. 

And dude a trooper because sometimes something will trigger me and my defenses go up and the walls circle around me. He's so patient with me and he always makes it a point to try to make things better for me. Fortunately we have a mutual friend who we get on the phone to assist when we really need it. lol Ok. Ok. We don't really get that bad but calling our friend has become a "thing to do" to hold us accountable and to make sure we stay on track.