The Hardest Most Necessary Conversation

Transparent Moment:

I met an amazingly handsome and intelligent man about six years ago. We both have worked hard on our friendship. We try to see each other's side and come a little closer to a happy medium. Every time we get to the middle, the friendship falls apart. We generally fall apart around Fall and rekindle around Spring. I don't know what it is but around Fall we have a disagreement and I shut down. By Spring he reappears, always trying to make things better. 

Recently I went to counseling, remember this is transparent. He came up in a session and what came out of that session was like an "aha moment". He's well educated, professional, well dressed, speaks different languages and he takes care of his children. Which is a stark contrast to men I'm used to dating.

Yet, she also referred to him as my old comfortable shoe. He's always there whenever you want to be around him. Then she went on to assist me in seeing how he was so different than any man that I dated but he had one thing in common with them. He wasn't emotionally available for me. 

I saw passed that because he was super intelligent and for once I didn't have to dumb myself down in our conversations. He told me that he was attractive to my intellect and that I was pretty to him. He saw who I am but he didn't have time to commit. He didn't have the desire to commit but had he met me 20 years ago things would have been different. 

In one of my sessions my therapist challenged me to be completely alone for awhile and see what happens. I did just that since September. Last week we saw each other after months of no communication and I said what I needed to say. More for myself than for him. I'm worth more and I deserve more. He wanted to know why  things can't stay the same and we see what happens. Dude, it's been six years, if it hasn't happened by now.... 

I sat there looking at his handsome and distinguished self all giddy and stuff and I asked him to do something for me. It wasn't hard either, I simply asked that he not text or call me to let me know that he wanted to see me. He looked at me with those beautiful golden eyes and simply said, "Ok, I won't."

The next day I spoke to a pastor that mentors me. He shared that we had talked about this man for years but he felt that this time I was over it, I was released from it. 

It's hard to let go of what's comfortable but it's oh, so necessary. 

The Royal Wedding 2018

I think I decided last night before I fell asleep that I would watch as much of the Royal Wedding as possible. So, I've kept my t.v. on as I slumber on the couch. I've awaken to several segments but once I saw Oprah was there I completely woke up to watch. 

There is so much to be said about Prince Harry and Meghan Markle but the only thing to be said is that this is their time and millions of us, possibly billions of us, are awake to witness what God has brought together. 

Unexpected

When the year began our church went on a fast for 48 days. During that time we abstained from certain foods and we read the Bible daily. It was an interesting task for me to say the least and I endured til the end. This fast was super important to me because I had gotten hurt badly the previous year and I wanted better for myself. I needed to get me together this year.

 

After the fast I was contacted by a guy I knew from years ago. I remember when he reached out I thought, "He wants to be in contact with me?" And yes, I texted my one of my girlfriends because the guy and I were never cool, we were cordial but not cool. I lightweight struggled with him reaching out to me.

 

So, I took a chance. In my mind I could only question, "What does he want?" "What now?" Because once you go through some stuff everybody is suspect. The first time I saw him it was both awkward and fun. It was weird trying to figure out the social cues with him. Although he's easy on the eyes that's not what this is.

 

Looking over the past few months my friend, we're friends now lol, has been more than I could have ever expected. I write these things but I won't tell him but I'll send him the link. Go figure.

 

We don't talk on the phone or see each other regularly but he cares for me in a way that I believe pleases God. Often, I awake to messages that are God centered and speak to what I'm going through. I don't have to respond either they are simply for me to read or listen to. A couple of those videos I listen to over and over again.

 

Some mornings when I can't sleep instead of going to Fb or IG, I go to the Bible app and he's on there too. I believe that our friendship is vibrational. I can text him or email him at any hour of the night and it doesn't turn into anything inappropriate. I so thank God for that.

 

I remember one day I told him how much I appreciated him. His response was that he was simply being obedient to send to me what God had showed him to send. All I had was, "Wow!"

 

Had I not went through the fast I don't know if I would have been prepared for something so awesome, so unexpected, so simply beautiful.

 

For that I'm thankful.

 

 

 

 

Let's talk Leggings!

Angelo And Veronica - All Things Work

So,exactly how did Romans 8:28 become my favorite verse? Several years at a concert featuring Iyanla Vanzant I was introduced to the ministry of Angelo & Veronica. They sang a song, All Things Work. I kept thinking “What works?” I asked my mom about it and she simply told me to read Romans 8. It immediately became my favorite verse and something I’ve come to live by.

PJ Morton feat. YEBBA How Deep Is Your Love ‘Gumbo Unplugged’

Mother’s Day Brunch At The Capital Grille

 

 

Yesterday my son and I dined at The Capital Grille for their Mother's Day Brunch. When I initially saw the email I decided that I would be nice to myself and called to make a reservation. I had went over the menu several times and I had decided on the salmon dish but something prompted me to try the Shrimp & Grits. When the dish arrived I was concerned that it may be  spicy. I told the server that if I started choking that means it's too spicy. She assured me that if it was I could order something else and that she had tried it and really liked it.

 

I took one bite and guess what? I really liked it. My overall experience has me one, already putting this brunch on the calendar for next year and two, wondering if they will have a brunch for Father's Day. If they have one for Father's Day I'm going to have a mini Oprah moment to fathers that I celebrate and say, " You get a brunch, you get a brunch, and you get a brunch."

 

If you haven't guessed. I absolutely love The Capital Grille. 

Happy Mother’s Day

I hope everyone had a wonderful Mother’s Day.

The Zinc House ~ My Dream House

Today I’m out eating and I feel something familiar about the area. I had never been to the restaurant, The Silver Spring House. After lunch I rode around and recognized homes I’d looked at online. One of my dream homes is called The Zinc House. I saw it online years ago and fell all the way in love.

 Today I dined on the street where this house is located. I honestly just realized that.

My dream home is a contemporary home. Think a miniature Crossroads Church interior with a Zen garden. This home is all that I could dream of. If it goes on sale again I’m going inside. When I’m blessed to build a new home I’m contacting this builder. 

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Lindarinsights Is On Wordpress

As a vehicle to share my self-publishing journey I began posting at Wordpress a couple of months ago. I'll share tips about beginning the writing process from getting thoughts on paper to the copyright process to getting work printed. Soon I'll be releasing my pricing info page for Lindarinsights too.

I'm excited to share this with those who want to get their stories out there. I'll also be uploading my self-created lessons on Mindfulness which I am uber excited about. I'll be posting about that journey soon. Being mindful has been a joy to teach and to incorporate in my everyday life.

Although, I only have two posts up take a look when you get a chance.

I've been #buildmybrand busy this year.